Lacking Animation Or Interest, Part II
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Now, today's story...
I apologize for delaying the conclusion to this story by a day. I wasn't around much yesterday, or today really. Without further adieu... part deux.
We continued our harrassment of Mark in hopes of eliciting a reaction worthy of airplay on ABC's America's Funniest Home Videos. After two failed attempts, Thursday's traps had to go off without a hitch, or else we'd be in trouble.
We set up the first one in the back hallway, a hallway Mark would have to travel if he ever wanted to get back to his bedroom. We tied fishing line across the hall about eight inches off the ground. That line was tied to a five-pound weight. The weight was tied to two party poppers. They make a loud sound with the string is pulled.
One of hte poppers we emptied the streamers from and refilled with powder (later realizing it should've been flour). We duct taped them to the door frame so they wouldn't budge and waited for Mark to get home from school and, well, trip the wire. The camera was in place. Mark shuffled down the hallway and barely flinched at the popping overhead and the powder dust filled air.
Zero for three. This was becoming discouraging.
We set up the next prank in time for dinner. We tied a rubber band around the spray nozzle attached to the kitchen sink. The way this works, if you're unfamiliar, is by turning on the faucet, water sprays out of the nozzle. Distance depends on water pressure.
We warned everyone else in the house to avoid using the kitchen sink (or else risk soaking yourself). When Mark finished dinner, he walked his plate to the sink. Now let me try and set the scene a little. The kitchen sink is positioned behind the island counter where my grandma sits for dinner. A person who planned ahead would've realized that Mark would move once initially sprayed, leaving the poor old lady to get rained on in the middle of her meal.
This is exactly what happened, though luckily Mark reacted quickly enough to shut off the water before flooding the house. I have to say, though, that my grandma's reaction was pretty funny.
Four bad pitches. At this point, the batter would simply be permitted to walk to the base, wouldn't he? But we needed to make one more go of it just to satisfy ourselves. The best one yet. The one sure to get a huge reaction. A horrified reaction.
Jason and I had our mom tell Mark that he'd be coming home from school alone on Friday. She gave him a house key and the rest was up to us. Everyone hid in the master bedroom but me. I hid in my grandma's room down the hallway next to Mark's room.
I was outfitted with a Scream costume and another party popper. The camera was set up at the end of the hallway. My job was to jump out and scare him as he made his way down the hallway. As you can guess, I was wildly unsuccessful.
I jumped out hollering and put a death grip on his arm all while shooting off a party popper. His reaction was similar to swatting at an irritating fly. Vapid. He was utterly without reaction.
Anyway, we later revealed to him that all of this failed stunts were recorded on tape and his vapidity will now keep us from winning the big money. It's all his fault.
All because he lacks animation or interest.
Caught On Tape: I have four of the five pranks on video for your pleasure. If you have even the slightest interest, you can watch the non-reactions materialize by clicking here.
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